Joke of the Day - First Mammogram

Many women are afraid of their first mammogram, but there�s no need to worry. By taking a few minutes each day for a week preceding the exam, and doing the following practice exercises, you will be totally prepared. And you can do this right in your own home!

Exercise 1

Open your refrigerator door and insert one breast between the door and the main box. Have one of your strongest friends slam the door shut and lean on the door for good measure. Hold that position for five seconds (while you hold your breath). Repeat again, in case the first time wasn�t effective enough.

Exercise 2

Visit your garage at 3 am when the temperature of the cement floor is just perfect. Take off your clothes and lie comfortably on the floor with one breast wedged under the rear tire of the car. Ask a friend to slowly back the car up until your breast is sufficiently flattened and chilled. Turn over and repeat for the other breast.

Exercise 3

Freeze two metal bookends overnight. Strip to the waist. Invite a stranger into the room. Press the bookends against one of your breasts. Smash the bookends together as hard as you can. Set an appointment with the stranger to meet next week and do it again!!

CONGRATULATIONS! Now you have nothing at all to worry about when you go for your mammogram!
“““““

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Preliminary 2010 County Budget Leaves Officials with Several Options for Covering Shortfall

The County of Bucks’ 2010 preliminary budget presented this afternoon by Acting Chief Operating Officer/Director of Finance and Administration Brian Hessenthaler and Deputy Finance Director David Boscola reflects the county’s ongoing focus on responsible fiscal stewardship and taxpayer value. Despite a turbulent economic climate, the proposed operating budget of $446.9 million represents a budget-to-budget reduction of $20.7 million – the vast majority of which is attributed to Mental Health/Mental Retardation funding that will be paid directly by the state to various providers. According to Hessenthaler, the current operating budget draft represents a work-in-progress, including input from the administration, courts and row offices.

“All in all, our division leaders, department heads and court and row officials have done a real nice job getting us to this point,” Hessenthaler notes. “We will continue to explore ways to reduce expenditures between now and December 16 (when Commissioners Charles H. Martin, James F. Cawley, Esq. and Diane M. Ellis-Marseglia, LCSW will vote on the document).”

Underscoring the county’s prudent finance strategy, Bucks will carry over a projected general fund balance of $69.7 million entering 2010. Both Hessenthaler and Boscola praised the Board of Commissioners for its support of strengthening the general (or “rainy day”) fund. This fund has enabled the county to maintain a high level of services, fulfill contractual obligations, prevent layoffs, and continue to sustain its highest-ever ratings with credit agencies. As a result, these measures have led to reduced borrowing rates, yielding taxpayer savings.

Weighed against revenue projections, the proposed 2010 budget creates a $7.1 million gap. Detailing the reasons for the shortfall, Hessenthaler pointed to reductions in state funding, decrease in interest rates which negatively impacts interest earnings, and increased pension and healthcare costs. The amount budgeted for the 2010 pension contribution alone increased by almost $7.5 million compared to 2009.

As has been the case with previous budgets, the county’s Health and Human Services Division accounts for the largest portion of the entire operating budget, or 46 percent ($205.9 million). Departments under the realm of public safety comprise 31 percent ($137.6 million) of the total.

Another highlight is that the county thus far has been able to avoid layoffs. The preliminary budget shows a net reduction of two positions, which includes two vacant Planning Commission positions, one Board of Assessment slot that will not be filled due to attrition, and the addition of a full-time Spanish language interpreter for the Court of Common Pleas.

Hessenthaler explains that the commissioners have several alternatives to cover the $7.1 million shortfall as they consider adoption of a final budget, which traditionally has occurred during the final Commissioners’ Meeting of the calendar year: enact further cuts to expenditures, investigate additional sources of revenue, draw down the county’s general fund balance, raise taxes, or some combination thereof.

Chairman Martin strongly opposes a tax increase in the current economic climate, pointing out that the county’s existing string of three straight years with no property tax increase marks the first such streak since 1994-96. Since 2007, the county’s millage rate has been held steady at 21.942.

“Although we have reached the point where I am comfortable presenting this preliminary budget to the commissioners, we will continue exploring avenues to reduce the shortfall,” Hessenthaler reiterated. “This budget, with all of its challenges, remains a work in progress.”

During the upcoming weeks, the proposed 2010 budget will undergo close scrutiny by the Board of Commissioners. That process will include a public budget meeting, during which any interested member of the public will be encouraged to ask questions and offer input. The budget includes provisions for departments serving Bucks County residents such as the Emergency Management Agency, Fire Marshal, Consumer Protection, Military Affairs, Board of Elections, Mental Health/Mental Retardation, Health and Emergency Health, Area Agency on Aging, Children and Youth, and Parks and Recreation, among others. The budget also provides for courts and elected row offices, including the District Attorney, Clerk of Courts, Sheriff, Prothonotary, Controller, Recorder of Deeds, Register of Wills, Coroner and Treasurer.

To view the 2010 preliminary budget, please visit www.BucksCounty.org and click on the 2010 Preliminary Budget link on the home page. Stay tuned to the official county Web site for continuously updated information about the budget process.

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Add comment December 12th, 2009


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